Thursday, July 18, 2013

Extroverted introversion, with a dash of genius

How about a little introspection to break up the bitchfest about all the annoying shit going on right now? Sounds good to me, and this is my blog, so read it. Or not. I don't care. Except, I do. I really, really do. I need you to understand me, total stranger reading my blog, because I do not even fully understand myself. That's the whole point of this thing. Catharsis. Spilling words instead of blood.

So, since we've been on the subject of catch phrases, let's examine another one. I admit that I throw this one around quite casually:

"I don't play well with others."



Now, some people will wear this on a T-shirt, and think it's clever or funny, and usually the person wearing the shirt is neither clever, nor funny, and not someone I would wish to play with to begin with. In fact, I would most often like to punch them right in their smarmy faces. Not that I'm that violent. I mean, if I went around punching everyone who annoyed me, I'd be sitting in a little white room somewhere.

When I say that I don't play well with others, I am referring to the fact that I am an introvert. In terms of participating in shenanigans with other humans, there are several factors that must be taken into consideration, including, but not limited to:

  • What "others" we are talking about
  • How many "others" are involved
  • How long I am expected to "play" with these "others"
  • Whether or not "playing well with others" is a requirement
  • How much coffee I've had, how many cigarettes I have left, and whether I brought my clonazepam with me.

I have no trouble with public speaking. I enjoy contributing ideas in formal settings. In bye-gone days, I was quite the spotlight hog. I am extremely talkative once you get me going on a subject that interests me. (Whether it interests you is inconsequential. I will do my best to make it interest you, and if you aren't interested, I ignore you. This really only happens on the Internet.)

I write copiously about my mental processes, how I view the world, my spirituality, my perception of my current position in life, and the pain of my past. People perceive me as very trustworthy. For some reason, I am often privy to things that no one else knows. It's a talent of mine, I suppose. Total strangers tell me things they have never told anyone. I suppose it's because, at this point, I am nigh un-shockable. I have even had a man confess to me a murder. I did not turn him in. For all I know, he could have been schizophrenic, and the incident in question never happened at all. People tell me the damndest things at bus stops...

Yet, for all this, I am a ravening introvert. A while back, I found a fantastic illustration of what this means. I'm posting it here for posterity.



It may seem paradoxical, but I've known quite a few people who fall into this category of "extroverted introverts," with a bit of ADD and hypomania tossed into the mix. And I'll tell you a secret: No matter how animated I become, or how fast I talk, my mind is operating at at least twice the observable speed. Sometimes there is simply too much I want to express, and not enough time in which to do it. I often wish I could simply link my mind with the people people I'm talking to, so we did not have to be burdened with the tedium of language. This leads to a deficit in terms of information I wish to exchange and the capacity to exchange it in a limited space of time, which, in turn, leads to anxiety, until the point at which I drift away from the group and sit by myself. I go back to my safe place. I sink into my own thoughts, work out problems, play games, or write long, narcissistic entries like this, to be read to my therapist at a later date.

I'm actually a raging Aspie, but I'm so damned good at faking it, no one can tell. Usually.

I worry sometimes that people read my behaviour as odd at best, snobby or cruel at worst. I don't mean to be, I honestly don't. I don't know if this is something I can really change, or that I want to change. This is why jobs that involve dealing with human beings all day long are so draining for me. Is it arrogant of me to say that I feel that 90% of the people I meet doing a retail job are inconsiderate, privileged, ignorant morons? I have so little tolerance for it that one eight-hour shift at a customer service position leaves me feeling like I need a stiff drink. And I don't drink. Much. Except if it's mead. And it's sulfite-free.



I think I've drifted off-topic here, but it's some stuff, anyway. Needed to get it off my chest.

No comments:

Post a Comment